Dear Chris,
It was hard - another Christmas without you. How you loved Christmas! All week long, as I tried to busy myself and not "think", memories filled my mind at an even faster pace than usual. Over and over, I kept picturing your last moments - what were you thinking, how were you feeling. I can't bear the thought that you suffered so much those last minutes of your life. And I wasn't there to protect my baby.
Yesterday, after placing flowers at your gravesite, little Christopher was asking me why I was so sad. Then he put his "sad face" on and told me that he was sad too because he missed Uncle Chris so much. He wants to come and see you but I told him that he had to wait a long time. I did tell him, though, that once he saw his Uncle Chris that he would never ever be separated from him - that we would all be together forever! He smiled!
God continues to bless me but nothing will ever replace the loss I have suffered. Your memories keep me going until we are together again.
Missing you and loving you,
Mom
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